Relationships I have missed out on.

There are 4 types of relationships I have missed out on or not seen within a family circle. 

1. A Grandad. 

I know I had one on my Dads side, but he never got in contact with me or vice versa, and I don't speak to any family in Sweden anyway, but he is dead now. But on my Mums side I don't really have the slightest clue who he is. My mum has never mentioned having a dad nor my Gran mentioned having a husband, but she has mentioned things from her wedding. And I have never asked who my Grandad is. I think he may have been called Michael, as there is a man called Michael (then my surname) in my Grans phonebook and then a number, obviously. But he is never mentioned. Never. I want to know I suppose, because he is my Grandad after all, and I don't know what it is like to have one, I don't know what they do, do they buy special sweets from years ago? Do they always have a grump on? I have no idea, I will try and find out one day. The Grandad from The Parent Trap was overly cute. 

2. A Gran and Grandad relationship.

I have my Gran living down the road from me, but as I just stated, I have no idea who her husband is (she is still married), or who my Grandad is. Therefore I have never experienced what it is like to see a relationship between the two. I would like to think of them to be a sweet old couple, the type that still hold hands and laugh together. But I have never experienced that relationship, so I wouldn't know. The old Allie and Noah from The Notebook are what I would like them to be like (obviously when Allie remembered Noah). 

3. A Dad. 

Yes, I do have a Dad. But as I have previously mentioned we do not speak because of my own reasons. I have experienced having a Dad a few times in my life, for example when I used to visit Sweden and when he used to come over to England every now and then, but he never acted like a father. He still doesn't, he has never sent any money over to my Mum to help look after me and my brother, but he will put money towards his girlfriend and her child, also called Jasmine, which I find sick in all honesty (yes, she does have an E on the end and she pronounces it Jasssmeeen, whereas I have no E on the end of my name and pronounce it Jazzmin, so we don't really have the same name). He has never asked in my life how I am doing at school or college or what grades I am getting. He probably rings about once every 2 months to speak to my brother (Jai finds him amazing and thinks the sun shines out of his arse). So I have not spoke to my 'Dad' for years, and I never intend to again. I wish I had a different father, I sometimes hate my mother for ever being with him. I always dreamt of having a father like Nick out of The Parent Trap, he just seemed so caring and amazing, even if he was dumb for being with Meredith. It was like a dream to have him as a father. It still is really, but I have coped practically seventeen years without one, I can cope a bit longer. I even wanted my Mum to get married for absolutely ages, just so I could have a stepdad, I wanted to feel love from a father like figure, I still do really, I wouldn't mind my Mum seeing a man. But again, I have coped seventeen years without a father like figure, I can cope longer. 

4. A Mother and Father relationship. 

My Mum and Dad split up when I was a baby, so I never saw them together, well I did, but not in a lovey or friendly way. And because my Mum never met a man and never got married, I have never witnessed a mother and father relationship in my own home. I do not think this bothers me so much, well it does, because I think it would feel so incredibly special to feel that love in a home (I suppose you wouldn't really notice it if you have always been around it), but then again, I am not bothered by the fact that I do not have to witness it! I couldn't really think of an example from a film that makes me really jealous that I don't experience the love a mum and dad would bring to a home, but I love the film The Time Traveler's Wife, and Henry and Clare were actually really lovely parents when they had Alba.

~Jazz